This is from my friend Courtney Bolton. And I can relate.
writing this very quickly.... I'm seriously walking down St. Marks loving New York & thinking of all the reasons why I can still move back here, why it's good and I can still do all the things I need to do, the light is so lovely, I will live near Tompkins Sq park, do my yoga, etc etc. Really trying to convince myself that "I can." And then, I look up and right in front of me I see this sign, of course start crying again, no, no, that sign is not true I try to prove to myself... it's like this part of me really doesn't want to leave, really doesn't want to say goodbye, loves the city. And this other part knows, just knows, that I have to go. Cries when I see the Statue of Liberty out the F train window or as the plane flies over the city at perfect summertime 8p golden shifting shadows. I see the "why curry?" sign and just start aching again, streaming tears I just have to let go, I really wish I could stay here but I Know I Can't and that's so hard.